He should respect your feelings. Its your body and he should respect your choices on how you choose to show your affection to him. Does he really want to feel that you slept with him due to pressure now? Or would he rather you become intimate with him when you want to (after the marriage?)
(If you are worried about religious aspects arrange a meeting with your officiant. Most offer pre-marriage classes and address this subject.)Advice please on Engagement pertaining to Sex before marriage!?
Only you know the right answer to this.
Many, like you, feel that sex belongs only in a marriage. They are correct.
Others, feel that sex is a super important part of a relationship (it is), and they cannot spend the rest of their lives with someone with whom they are not sexually compatible. (Yes, you can have two people who love each other very much who are not sexually compatible, physically, emotionally, or both). They are EQUALLY correct.
You and your fiance need to figure out your respective philosophies. You may find, after a frank discussion, that you are actually on the same page. Otherwise, it will come down to a choice between compromise or going your separate ways.
No you should not make love until your wedding night. You have waited this long and your fiance should respect you enough to wait a wee bit longer. Make him wait, he will appreciate it more and learn to respect you in the process. If you give in and you do end up marrying, he will think you are some type of pushover and he can make you do whatever he wants you to do. Do not give in to him. Stand up for what you believe in. There are other things you can do besides intercourse. he is just going to have to deal with those other things until you get married.
IF U NEED TO PROVE U ARE TRULY IN LOVE WITH HIM BY SEXUAL GRATIFICATION THEN U NEED TO RE THINK THIS ENGAGEMENT. U HAVE REMAINED A VIRGIN AND U NEED TO KEEP THIS PURE TILL YOUR WEDDING NITE. IF YOUR BOYFRIEND GAVE U THE RING FOR THE CHERRY THEN TELL HIM TO TAKE A HIKE. HE ISNT WORTH U LOSING THE PUREST THING KNOWN TO WOMAN JUST TO SATISFY HIM... DONT DO IT AND LET HIM KNOW THAT U ARE WAITING FOR THE WEDDING NITE TO MAKE IT MORE SPECIAL FOR THE BOTH OF U... IF HE GETS MAD THAN IT WASNT MEANT TO BE AND KISS HIM OFF... I AM SORRY BUT I WOULDNT GIVE HIM MY ULTIMATE PURITY UNTIL WEDDING NITE...
I do not think that you should make love to him until your wedding night. Something sounds kinda fishy here. Yes, technically once you have that engagement ring on your finger your as good as married according to God. It sounds to me like he is trying to get you to give it up before your married and then what if he decides to leave and end the relationship. If he truly loves you he will wait just a little bit longer for it. You do not need to have sex to show someone that you love them.
If getting married is determined by whether you make love to him or not...then DO NOT marry him.
In this day and age, it really is going to be a personal call for you. Sex before marriage is incredibly honorable and admirable. You guys are engaged to be married, so if that is the case, i see no reason why you can't make love.
however, please don't feel pressured to have sex just because your fiance wants to. it's YOUR choice, and if in the end, you decide to wait until your wedding night, then that is your choice, and your future husband should respect that.
i hope this helps! good luck!
You should do whatever feels right for you. If you want to wait until marriage, that's what you should do. If your fiance really cares about you then he will respect that. If someone really loves you he won't try to pressure you into ANYTHING. If he gets an attitude, give him some vaseline and point to the door, because he's not the man for you.
depending on how you feel I made love to my fiance before we were married but I had to have a ring on my finger first just do what yu feel is best
Asking or pressuring you to have sex BEFORE marriage goes against what you believe in. Therefore he doesn't respect you on the right level.
Ask yourself this, if you have sex with him and he dumps you shortly after then how will you feel? No wedding and your promise to yourself is shot.
You are not married till the papers are signed, sweetie don't kid yourself on that one. Check it out, if he was sexual active BEFORE you met, has he really stopped having sex just because of your relationship? Does he tell you lies? Does he pressure you into other things?
if you give up your virginity with only a ring and the OPTION to marry, then ( sorry if this is harsh ) but what makes it any different than the lump sum of money he paid for the ring being given to you??? ( instead of the ring ?? ) in his eyes he is ';paying'; for it, so why shouldn't he get what he wants?? i would hate for you to end up giving up your virginity and the ring too if he changes his mind.... if he truly loves you, then he would trust your love and not ask you to give him a gift that you want to wait till the wedding night to give.... good luck
My Fiance and I both made decisions to wait until we were married to have sex. So he and I are both virgins. Our decision is deeply rooted in our religious beliefs. Whatever your reason for not wanting to doesn't really matter, it CAN be done. I promise! You should be able to tell him no and he shouldn't do anything to make you feel guilty about your decision. He should respect you. Good luck and God bless! =]
sounds like he asked you to marry him just to get you in bed... I would hold off and see if he takes the commitment seriously.
If it has been so important to you thus far to wait until marriage, then don't give that up because he's pressuring you. And if he's pressuring you, you might want to reconsider the marriage because if he is making you question your own morals, he isn't that great of a guy.
If he will understand, then you should definitley wait. You have waited 29 years to have sex a few more months and you'll have made it to you wedding!
I waited until my wedding night to be with my hubby and it was hard but rewarding.
Of course you want to be with him, you love him! If he loves you and respects you he will wait because it is important to you.
Find other ways to express your feelings of love to him. Maybe you could write him a song or a poem, cook him dinner. You said you wanted to be with him for the rest of your lives, i don't know how you could make it any clearer. I'm sure he's wants you just as bad as you want him, but I think you'll feel better about yourself if you just wait.
don't let the pressure get to you.
Congratulations!
No comments:
Post a Comment